I Ain't No Mind Reader!

This week in class we were looking at the different perspectives to look at families. What really stood out to me the entire time was how much we influence one another, either for good or bad. I think that sometimes we think that our actions don't affect anyone but us. But that is not true. It is really important to really take the time to listen and understand one another. 

One of the perspectives was the Symbolic Interaction Theory. It means that our actions convey a meaning to others, but it's what the other person perceives or interprets by it. I can try to do something nice for my roommate like wash her dishes but to her it might mean that I think she's a slob and I cant stand to look at her dishes. (Oh and this not only applies to our families but with anyone we have a relationship with).  

We also talked a lot about roles. The roles we have within these relationships.  We assume different roles when we are at home, school, work, church and so on. There is always a good kid, a bad kid, the peacekeeper, the smart one, the lazy one. Our professor gave an example that really stood out to me. He said that his two sons would always fight and one was always the bully and the other the victim. He said that one day, he overheard them talking. He heard, "Give it to me!" the victim son said. My professor immediately thought that his older brother was bullying him. But then he stopped and kept listening. "No, it's mine!" the "bully" son said. The younger one then told him that if he didn't give it to him, he was going to tell his dad and that he will believe him. The older "bully" son then said, "I know, he always does". My professor then felt horrible that he had always labeled his sons in those roles as bully and victim. It really struck me because it is very easy to assign these roles to one another but we don't stop and think how this might be affecting them. 

By taking the time to learn these things, we can better understand the people around us and the reasons they do the things they do. We may not be able to read everyone's minds but we can always talk to one another and pay attention to their needs. Let's not be quick to judge but take the time to love one another :)